A giant carnivorous plant has been imported to the UK by naïve scientists. The monster, a Puya chilensis, originally from Chile, is expected to flower in the next few days. The plant has giant spikes on which it snares sheep and other animals, which then starve to death and fertilise the soil in which it stands.
"It's growing in the arid section of our glasshouse with its deadly spines well out of reach of both children and sheep alike," reports horticulturalist Cara Smith of the National Botanic Garden of Wales. Sources from the garden affirmed that there is no danger of the plant seeding its young outside the glasshouse and spreading a giant forest of death across Britain. Reports that other specimens of this deadly plant are already flowering in the open on the Scilly Isles have been dismissed as "nothing to worry about", as are rumours of nocturnal visitors to the National Botanic Garden of Wales and strange sounds of chanting coming from the Puya chilensis' greenhouse.
An inuit panda production